It's Where My Demons Hide
by tinkspixiedust28
Summary: Bella is moved to Forks by her dad Charlie and brother Emmett to start a new life. Demons from Bella's past haunt her everyday and she works to overcome her fears. Help is found in a new boy at school. Edward is gentle and kind, but hides secrets of his own.
1. Nightmares

_Disclaimer- Twilight is , ever so sadly, not mine, but belongs to the beautiful Stephenie Meyer. _

_Chapter 1- Nightmares_

_I shut my eyes tight and try to keep my breathing even, hoping that if he thinks I'm asleep he'll change his mind and leave. But I know it won't work. It never works. I'm glad I lay on my side facing away from him, because it makes it harder for him to see the terror on my face. He slowly pads over to my bed, and I can sense him standing behind me. He must have been out partying with Laurent because he smells of cheap whiskey and cigarettes. His breathing is ragged and labored. Tears escape down my cheeks as he peals back my covers. _

_"I know you're awake" he murmurs angrily. I lay still and fight to keep my breathing even. He slowly traces his finger down my spine and I have to bite my lip to keep from crying. When he reaches my bottom, he hooks his finger into the elastic of my boy shorts and pulls them down my legs. With feather soft touches, he walks his fingers back up and roughly paws the naked flesh of my behind. His hand leaves my skin and painfully reconnects with a sharp slap. A shocked cry threatens to tear it's way up my throat, but I force it back down. _

_"Come on Isabelle. Scream. You know how much I love it" He rubs the stinging skin of my bottom. His hand disappears before he slaps it back down, harder than the first. This time I cry out. "See what happens when you ignore me. I have to punish you." I listen as he undoes his belt buckle and pull it through the loops of his blue jeans. My teeth clench as I prepare for this new assault. The air in the quiet room is thick and stagnant as I draw in as much air as my lungs will allow. I hear the whisper of the belt as it cuts through the air right before it bites into my flesh. A tortured scream rips it's way from my throat and my eyes swim with unshed tears. _

_"Roll over. Now" I rake in a deep breath and hold it so I won't cry. I refuse to give him the satisfaction of my tears. 'I will be strong this time. I will not cry. I will be strong this time. I will not cry.' I repeat those words over and over in my head as I roll onto my back. He gently slips his hand between my thighs and jerks them apart suddenly, so that I'm completely open to him. _

_"You look so beautiful like this" His compliment draws bile up to my mouth and I have to concentrate on swallowing it back down. He unzips the front of his blue jeans and I hear them fall to the floor. The bed dips as he sits down next to me, and his hand moves to cup my groin. I bite the inside of my cheek when his finger circles around my opening, and I taste blood when he shoves his finger inside. My spine bows off the bed when he painfully thrusts his finger inside me again and I cry out. I hear his grumbling moan of satisfaction. _

_He momentarily stops the torment of his finger. "Sit up" he commands. I ignore him, I will not make this easier for him. I don't move. 'I will be strong this time' I think to myself. He grabs a fistful of my hair and violently tugs it so hard it pulls me up into a sitting position. _

_"What did I say about you ignoring me _sis_?" he asks in a teasing tone._

_"I am _**not** _your sister" I reply with controlled anger. "Emmett is my brother. You are not nor will you ever be my brother" I conjure up all my feelings of anger so when I open my eyes, he will see only pure hatred in my glare. However, when I finally open my eyes, all I see is the back of his hand flying forward, right before it connects with the side of my face. Bright stars dance in front of my eyes and I blink repeatedly until my vision slides back into frame. A high pitched ringing in my ears drowns out whatever he said next. He looks at me expectantly. _

_"What?" I ask groggily. The corners of his mouth pull up into menacing smile. _

_"I asked 'Is that how you speak to your family?'"_

_"You are not my family!" I spit out. As he drew his arm back across his body in preparation to hit me again, I closed my eyes and exhaled, waiting for the blow to come. It's in these quiet moments before the pain I know is coming that I try to clear my mind, and relax my body. If I can calm myself enough, I can usually control my reaction. I refuse to let him see my pain. 'I will be strong this time. I will not cry'. The impact of his blow knocks my face to the side and slams me back down onto my bed. _

_He takes advantage of my disorientation, and grabs my hips to flip me over onto my stomach. He pushes my legs up underneath my body so that my naked bottom sticks up into the air. I feel his erection press against my inner thigh, as he uses a fistful of hair to pull my head back. I know this will be rough. I know this will hurt and that he will take his time. He makes it his goal, every time, to see me cry. 'I will be strong this time. I will not cry'. He gives a sharp tug on my hair to get my attention. _

_"Fight back Isabelle. I like it when you get frisky" he teases. _

_"Go to Hell" I sneer at him._

_"After you Izzy." And with that he sheathed his entire length inside me. My screams are instantly cut off by him smashing my face down into the mattress. I try to push my body back up, but his strong arm just keeps pushing my face back down. He grips my hips tightly as he pumps himself into me again and again, while my body convulses in pain every time he thrusts himself inside me. _

_"God, you're so fucking tight." he grunts. The dry friction I feel every time he pushes himself inside me is excruciating. I clench my teeth together so I don't cry. He leans over me, and I can feel the hot skin of his chest on my back. His mouth is close enough to my neck that his hot breath tickles the soft skin behind my ear. His fingers dig into my body so hard I know that I'm going to have bruises tomorrow morning. _

_Taking deep breathes, I try to clear my mind, and relax my body. I try to calm myself down and slow my heart rate. I inhale through my nose and exhale through my mouth. I distract myself from the pain by focusing on my breathing. 'I will be strong this time. I will not cry. I will be strong this time. I will not cry'. I wish mom and Phil were here. He can't do this when they're home. He has have to behave when they're home. Phil would disown him if he knew what his son was doing to me. _

_"Tell me you love my cock inside your pussy" he demands. He's degrading me and he knows it, but he was me to feel humiliated about myself too. I refuse his order knowing there will be some form of punishment. But I don't care. I would rather feel physical pain than emotional and mental pain. _

_"Say it!" He shouts. _

_"No!" I retort._

_"Say it or I will make you wish you did" He threatens. When I keep quiet, he violently slams into me. He pushes everything he has into me, and with every thrust I scream out in agony. I feel him tearing me apart from the inside out. It feels like razor blades every time he moves inside me. I can't help the tears that fall from my eyes. The pain is just too much for me to bear anymore. I can feel warm liquid dripping down my thigh, and I'm almost positive it blood. _

_"Don't you wish you said it now?" he asks condescendingly. "If you say it right now I'll end this quick and leave you alone" I feel defeated and just give in. _

_"Yes!" I cry. "Yes, I love your cock in my pussy! Now please, will you just stop!"_

_"When I'm done" he says. He quickens his pace and I begin to sob uncontrollably. I have given up, I am done being strong. He tightens his grip on my hips and he thrusts into me one last time then stills, emptying himself inside me. His warmth pouring into me burns like fire in the cuts and tears inside me like salt into an open wound. _

_He releases his hold on me and slides himself out of my battered flesh. I listen as he pulls his jeans back on and zips them up. It makes me jump when he pushes me over onto my side. He grabs me by my throat, pulling me up into a sitting position. With violent force, he slams his lips against mine and shoves his tongue into my mouth. Still holding my throat, he pulls back to look at my face. _

_"Your lips taste so salty when you've been crying. Mmm, I love it Isabelle. How long are mom and dad out of town for?_

_"Tonight and tomorrow night" I answer with a trembling voice._

_"Good. So see you again tomorrow night" I look him straight in the eye, hoping to see that he's joking. My stomach drops when I see nothing but seriousness in his dark eyes. A sob breaks it's way from my body and more tears spill over. He shoves me back down onto my bed. _

_"Clean yourself up. You're disgusting." With that, he turns and walks out of my room leaving me alone and ashamed. I look down and see blood staining my sheets. I get up and rip the sheet off my bed. Wrapping myself up in my quilt, I curl into a ball on the naked mattress. Despair and blackness consumes me as I sob uncontrollably. _

**BEEP . . . BEEP . . . BEEP . . . BEEP . . . **

For just a moment I'm lost and disoriented. My cheeks are wet from nightmares of the past and my heart is pounding painfully in my chest. I'm in my childhood bedroom and it's filled with the soft gray light of Fork Washington. He's 3000 miles away. He can't hurt me here. I reach over and smack the snooze button on my alarm clock. I throw back my blankets and let the cool morning air dissolve the thin layer of sweat that has accumulated all over my body. Closing my eyes, I clear my mind and relax my body. I distract myself from tortured memories by focusing on my breathing. Inhale through my nose and exhale out my mouth. I listen to the rain gently rapping against my bedroom window and Emmett's obnoxious snores coming from his bedroom next to mine.

It's been three months since Charlie and Emmett moved me out here to Forks with them. After I was released from the hospital, dad and Emmett packed me and my stuff into their car and left Jacksonville in the rearview mirror. I didn't want to leave mom, but I couldn't live with him anymore. Renee and Phil are still blissfully ignorant about the demented savage that sleeps under their roof. I haven't told Charlie either, because I wouldn't be able to face him after I told him how his little girl had been defiled repeatedly and how nobody could help her. Emmett knows. I told him everything after he found me screaming and thrashing in my bed one morning after Charlie left early to go fishing with Billy. He promised he wouldn't tell dad or mom either, that I had to do it myself when I was ready.

I got up out of bed and headed downstairs to start the coffee. Today was the first day of my junior year at Forks High School. The weather matched my mood, gray and cloudy. When I first arrived out here I missed the sunshine and heat of Jacksonville, but now I find comfort in the cloudy skies and rain. I took two mugs full of steaming coffee upstairs and walked into Emmett's room. He was sprawled out on his stomach across his bed, arms hugging the pillow he rested his head on.

"Emmett" I called softly, but his loud snores drowned me out. "Emmett!" I yelled. He lazily opened one sleepy eye and looked at me. "Gotta be bright eyed and bushy tailed for our first day Emmett!"

He closed his eye and turned his head away from me.

"I brought coffee" I said enticingly. He took a deep breath and pushed himself up into a sitting position. He grabbed the coffee I held out to him and grunted in tired appreciation. I sat on the edge of his bed beside him and took a sip of my own coffee.

"You ready for today?" he asked me.

"Yeah, I just wish it is was sunny today" I replied, turning to face him.

"Jesus Fucking Christ Bella! You look tired! Like really tired. Did you sleep at all?" I dropped my gaze and used my hair as a curtain between us so he couldn't see how tired I looked. I loved my brother, but sometimes I hated how much he worried about me. He didn't need anymore stress in his life. I always felt guilty for burdening him with my past.

"Not really" I answered truthfully. "I had nightmares again last night". For a long time Emmett didn't say anything, when I looked up and met Emmett's eyes, he just pulled me into a huge bear hug. At first I froze, then forced myself to relax in his embrace. It took most of the summer before I let anyone touch me at all. Emmett and Charlie are the only two I feel comfortable with enough to let them hug me. I don't like them touching me, but I don't hate it as much as I did. When we hug it's more for their sake than mine. They believe that hugs or loving embraces might help chase away old fears, but for me, it triggers the panic that's never too far below the surface.

"I'm gonna hop in the shower Emmett" I announce, pulling away. He just nods and lets me go. I walk across the hall into the bathroom and flip on the light. When I look into the mirror, my eyes are red and puffy and there are dark circles under my eyes. I looked worse when I first arrived in Forks. The right side of my face was bruised and swollen, along with other areas of my body. I could barely walk and barely spoke to anyone. I felt dead inside and sometimes still do. He hurt me more than physically. He broke my spirit and my soul. I was just an empty shell when I first came to Forks. Emmett and my dad have been working everyday to build me back up. I force myself to smile in the mirror. It almost looks real.

"I can do this!" I said out loud. "Today will be a good day because I will make it a good day" I told myself. I closed my eyes and cleared my mind and relaxed my body. I took a few deep breaths to calm myself.

That calm was immediately shattered when his face burst into my mind unbidden, flooding my mind with memories of pain and hopelessness. His face will haunt me the rest of my life. He will haunt me the rest of my life. I stared at my reflection in the mirror and pushed all thoughts of him away. This was going to be a good day. I wasn't going to let my stepbrother from hell ruin my day. I wasn't going to let James ruin my day.


	2. Author's Note

I just wanted to throw some information at my readers real quick.

1) Twilight is not mine. It belongs to the very talented Stephenie Meyer.

2) IWMDH is not Beta'd. There is only one person whom I would trust to Beta my story, but unfortunately she is studying abroad in Australia and I don't want to distract her from all she can experience there.

3) I hope to update every week, but as I'm getting married in July and therefore busy planning my wedding, some chapters may be delayed. So please be patient with me.

4) Reviews are always appreciated.

5) Imagine Dargons new album 'Night Visions' is the soundtrack for this story, but the song 'Demons' is my inspiration for this fic. So please check them out!

Thanks for reading my story! Check back tomorrow, because I will be uploading chapter 2!


	3. Fire

**Disclaimer- Twilight is not mine, although I always wish it was. This story has not been Beta'd, so I apologize in advanced for any misspellings or incorrect punctuation. Review are certainly appreciated! Thanks! **

The torrent of hot water hit my back in a pounding rhythm, slowly relaxing the tight muscles in my back. Steam floated and swirled around me, mixing with the scent from my shampoo, and I lost myself in a strawberry haze. Dark memories play like an old movie in my head, flickering from picture to picture, scenes of pain and torture inflicted by someone I had to pretend to love in the daylight. Back in Jacksonville I could only shower when mom and Phil were home, otherwise James would sneak into my bathroom and take advantage of my nakedness.

I miss my mom terribly, and I talk to her on the phone constantly, but I refuse to even think about going back and visiting her. At least not while James is still living under the same roof as her. Shame and regret wash over me, for never having confided in my mom about the abuse James put me through. I should have confessed everything to my mom when I woke up in the hospital, but I was still too scared of James. He swore to me that if I ever told my mom, that she would be next. My mother was a frantic, harebrained woman with the innocence of a child. She relied far too much on others for emotional and mental support. I knew she would never recover from being violated like I was.

A loud pounding on the bathroom door made me jump and cry out in panic. My arms instinctively moved to cover my body, a protective reaction from being attacked in the shower.

"Bella!" Emmett shouted through the door. "Hurry up, Rose will be here in 15, and I still have to shower"

"Ok" I called back shakily. I turned off the water, twisted my hair up into a towel and pulled back the shower curtain. The cool air assailed my naked flesh, and raised goose bumps all over my body. I pulled a thick, fluffy towel around my body and opened the bathroom door, only to find Emmett leaning against it's frame with a sad expression on his face.

"I'm sorry I scared you, I didn't mean to" he apologized. I tried to shrug nonchalantly, but I know it was a wasted effort. My brother was a walking bull-shit meter. It was a sixth sense of his.

"Do you think about him a lot?" he asked. I wanted to lie. I wanted to tell Emmett I never thought of James, that he didn't torment my every waking moment, but I made a promise with myself that I would always tell Emmett the truth. No matter how much it hurt for me to relive my painful past, I would always be honest with him. Sometimes when the truth was too embarrassing or disgusting, I wouldn't meet his eyes, because I didn't want to see the pain I experienced to be reflected in his eyes.

This was one of those moments. I looked down the hall towards Charlie's darkened bedroom and focused on the striped pattern of his quilt.

"More than I'd like to" I admitted. I counted 14 stripes on the quilt before I looked back at Emmett. The bright spark of light I always found in his eyes was now diminished to a smoldering ember hanging on for dear life. Guilt cradled me in it's cold embrace as I watched the color in Emmett's face fade slowly and his eyes fill up with unshed tears. I hated seeing my brother experience any kind of pain, especially when it wasn't his to carry. Any kind of human contact makes me uncomfortable, but in this moment, all I wanted to do was try and comfort Emmett in any way I could.

I closed the distance between our bodies, and wrapped my arms around his large frame. His arms closed around me and caged me against his chest. Pressing my face against him, I counted his heartbeats to distract myself from the uneasiness I began to feel at his touch.

"Emmett, I have to get dressed if Rose is gonna be here soon!" I squeaked out.

"Yeah, I gotta get in the shower." He pulled away without looking at me, and stepped around me into the bathroom and shut the door. I stood alone in the hallway, listening to the whine of the water pipes as Emmett showered.

After I dressed and towel dried my hair as best I could, I grabbed my backpack and jacket and walked downstairs. I dumped my stuff by the front door and headed into the kitchen to fix some breakfast for Emmett and myself. When he came down I had a pan full of hot scrambled eggs and a small stack of toast, we divvied up our breakfast and sat down together to eat. Neither of us felt much like speaking, so we ate in silence. Just as we were finishing up, Rose knocked on the front door.

"Go let Rose in, I'll deal with the dishes" Emmett told me. I nodded and rose from my seat. I tried to step around the chair, but my toe caught on one of the legs and I almost fell sideways. I managed to catch myself on the table before I hit the floor. Emmett was still laughing as I opened the door to Rose. Her long blonde hair was curled in loose, flowing waves, and she wore a cream colored cardigan over a forest green blouse with fitted blue jeans on bottom. She towered over me in her 4 inch black heels.

"What's that ape laughing about now?" Rose asked with a warm smile. She bent down and air kissed my cheek, causing me to freeze for a second, but we both pretend it didn't happen. I loved Rose, she was perfect for Emmett, always keeping him from getting too rowdy or obnoxious. Rose and my brother had been dating for three years, ever since they met freshmen year. When I still lived in Jacksonville, Emmett and I talked on the phone every week, and all he ever talked about was Rose and how amazing she was. So when I first arrived in Forks, still sore and barely able to walk by myself due to James's last attack, Rose would help me in and out of the shower. At first, I hated it, because it made me feel like a burden to her, but she assured me I would be able to return the favor on her 21st birthday when she would be so drunk I would need to help her to the bathroom. We've become close friends ever since.

"I tripped over a chair" I admitted, feeling a blush creep slowly up. I grabbed my jacket and pushed my arms through the sleeves and swung my backpack onto my back. Rose and I stood in the doorway waiting for Emmett, and when he finally walked around the corner, into the living room he grinned at Rose.

"Morning babe" he said, the laughter still evident in his tone. He gave her a quick kiss on the cheek and grabbed his stuff. I followed Rose out to her car as Emmett locked up the house.

"Jasper's behind me, so you'll have to sit on the passenger's side Bella" Rose informed me.

"Ok!" I replied. Jasper was Rose's twin brother, he was very charismatic, intuitive, and super funny. He could always cheer me up with a new joke. Rose was waiting for Emmett to finish locking up before getting in the car, but I opened the door and slid in next to Jasper. He had blonde hair just like his sister, but his was cut short and shaggy, so that it fell just above the collar of his shirt. His brown eyes looked at me warily.

"You look tired Bella." he said apprehensively.

"Good morning to you too Jasper" I said, letting a small amount of sarcasm color my tone. His brown eyes bore into mine, and I shifted uncomfortably in my seat. "

"I'm fine Jasper. Really. I just didn't sleep well last night." He looked at me unconvinced.

"Hey Bella, did you hear about the man that lost his entire left side?"

"No?" I answered cautiously

"He's all right now! Get it? All right!"

"Yes" I laughed. "How do you know so many jokes?"

"I'm just naturally that funny" he said teasingly. "Some day I'm going to sweep a woman off her feet with my natural wit. And by that I mean she'll laugh so hard she falls over"

I laughed freely, shaking my head at his humor. Jasper is going to make some girl very happy one day. He was raised to be a real gentleman, and he embodies every sense of the word. Rose and Emmett both opened their doors and slid into the car. When Rose turned the ignition, the sounds of trumpets singing over a driving tambourine beat filled the car. I recognized the song instantly, and tapped my foot to the beat.

Momentarily forgetting where I was, I sang the first line out loud,

"_I don't like walking around, this old and empty house_". When I looked over at Jasper, he was smiling at me. He reached for my hand, and held it tightly in his as he sang the next line of the song out loud to me.

"_So hold my hand, I'll walk with you my dear._" I laughed as he squeezed my hand gently. Having only known him for three months, it really surprised me to learn that Jasper had a great voice! It was my turn to sing the next line.

"_The stairs creak as you sleep, it's keeping me awake_" Jasper shook his head slightly, laughing as I sang my line of our spontaneous duet.

"_It's the house telling you to close your eyes_" Jasper let his eyelids close dramatically as he sang the last of his line. Emmett twisted in his seat, with a look of disbelief on his face, to watch Jasper and I. I smiled at him as I sang the next line.

"_Some days I can't even trust myself_"

"_It's killing me to see you like this_" Jasper pretended to stab himself in his chest with dramatic flare as he sang his line. I was still laughing when Jasper met my eyes, and we sang the next line in unison.

"_Cause though the truth may vary, This ship will carry our bodies safe to shore_" We both laughed as the music returned to singing trumpets and tambourines. Emmett shook his head, and turned back to Rosalie, who just flashed a smile back at him. I looked back at Jasper who just shrugged his shoulders, and for the rest of the song, we would sing together, trading lines back and forth.

When Rose pulled into the parking lot of Forks High School, I felt a small twinge of nerves. I always hated the awkwardness of being the new girl. Everyone wanted to know your whole life's story in the 45 spare seconds they had before running to their next class. I spoke as Rose pulled into a parking spot.

"Thanks again Rose, for driving me too. I know you always give Em rides, but I didn't want to be driven to school on my first day in a police cruiser."

"Aww girl, you know it's not a problem! You're practically my sister!" She smiled "Do you know where the office is?" She asked. "That's where you get your class list" When I shook my head, she spoke again "Don't worry, Emmett can show you!"

"No, I'm sure I can find it on my own" I tried to argue.

"Bella, let Emmett show you, It'll be nice to walk into school without his hand on my ass!" She laughed.

"I can't help myself babe. I mean, have you seen your ass? It's a great one!" Emmett joked. I laughed when I heard jasper mutter "Gross" under this breath. Jasper turned to me and gave me a smile.

Emmett walked me to the office after we all piled out of Rose's car. He matched my stride, and nudged me with his elbow once we were out of earshot of Rose and Jasper.

"Are you nervous about today?" He asked. "Cause if it becomes too much, Rose said she'd let me use her car to take you home."

"I'll be fine." I told Emmett, but his look said he didn't believe me. "Honestly Em, I think I'm more worried about where I'm going to sit at lunch. I don't know anyone here." Emmett stopped walking and waited for me to stop and look at him.

"Bella, you don't have to do this. If you want to go home just say the word and we'll turn around now." I almost took Emmett up on his offer, but decided against it. Even if I skipped today, I would still have a first day tomorrow. I decided to just get it over with.

"Nah, let's just go get my class list. Maybe I'll have a class with Jasper or Rose.

"Or maybe me!" Emmett said enthusiastically.

"Let's hope not" I murmured. Emmett just shook his head and smiled.

"Really feeling the love today Bella." He snarked.

Emmett walked me to the office, where I got my class list from a plump lady sitting behind a cluttered desk. I walked next to Emmett looking over my schedule.

"History, Math, English, Biology, Art, then Gym" I listed off my schedule to Emmett.

"Damn, not a single class together. Too bad it would have been fun to embarrass you in front of an entire classroom full of people."

"Jerk" I muttered. "Well, I'm off to History. Save me a seat at lunch,'kay?"

"You bet! See you later Bells" And with that Emmett left to head to his first class. I kept walking down the hallway, lost in thought. As nervous as I was, I was excited to be at a school where I would never have to worry about running into James. I was so busy focusing on my new found freedom, I'd forgotten to focus on where I was going. Upon realizing I had walked two hallways too far, I stopped and started to turn around when the person behind me collided with me, knocking me flat on my ass.

"Oh my God, I'm so sorry, I wasn't watching where I was walking" The boy who knocked me over had a baby face with blonde hair, gelled into a messy creation. He looked down at me with bright blue eyes and a big smile.

"Here, let me help." He offered his hand to me, and pulled my arm to help me up, but when I was almost straight, he wrapped his arm around my side to help steady me. His close touch sent a panicked jolt coursing through my body, and caused me to jump away from his hold.

"I'm sorry" I apologized. I tried to play it off as best I could, "I'm just super ticklish"

"That's ok! I am too. I'm Mike. You must be Isabelle, Emmett has been talking about you all summer" Ice cold chills ran down my spine when he said 'Isabelle'. Only one other person ever called me that, and it made me feel sick thinking about it.

"Bella." I corrected him. "Just Bella"

"Ok 'just Bella', it was very nice to finally meet you, but I gotta run or I'm going to be late." Mike waved at me as he walked away towards his next class. I waved back and watched as Mike blended into the crowd of students scrambling through the hallway. Just as I was about to start walking, a girl with short inky black hair burst through the crowd just a few feet in front of me. Her eyebrows were drawn close together as she studied the school map she held in front of her face. She looked up at the classroom door next to her, then back down at the map. I could see her lips moving, as she talked to herself, trying to figure out which way to go. An involuntary smile spread across my face as I watched her, because I felt better knowing I wasn't the only student using a map to navigate the hallways. She wore a tight pair of faded blue jeans under an airy navy blue blouse. Her dark hair and dark shirt made her porcelain skin look translucent.

She must have felt me staring at her, because she looked up and locked eyes with me. Her eyes were two large pools of the brightest cobalt blue I have ever seen.

"You too, huh?" I asked as I held up my map, showing I was new to the school as well.

"Thank goodness, I'm not the only new girl" She replied. "Do you know your way around?"

"Yes I do." I actually did, I had just walked two hallways too far because I was distracted. "Which class do you have first?" I asked.

"Umm . . . ", she checked her class schedule. "History 301, in room 127." She read off. I smiled at her.

"I'm in the same class!" I held my hand out to her "I'm Bella by the way"

"Alice" She replied as she shook my hand. "I just moved here from Chicago. You?"

"Jacksonville" Alice's face lit up when I answered.

"I grew up in Mississippi, but moved to Chicago when I was 10. I sure do miss the sunshine" She admitted with a sigh. She gave a slight shake, as if to remind herself where she was. "Well Bella, do you know how to get to History 301?"

"Yep" I let the 'P' sound pop from my lips. Alice nodded and hooked her arm around mine.

"Led the way" she commanded. I stared down at our entwined elbows, in disbelief. When Alice touched me, the familiar jolt of panic I always felt was noticeably absent. I kept waiting for the anxious shock to explode through my system, but all I felt was the warmth of her skin. She noticed my scrutiny at our contact and started to pull her arm away.

"Sorry" she muttered quietly. "Edward always tells me I'm too friendly"

""NO!" I nearly screamed at her. Her eyes opened wider in response to my increased volume "No, I just . . . I'm sorry." I grabbed her arm and linked it around mine again. I smiled to myself more than to her. The physical contact between us actually felt good. It almost made me feel human again. "Lets go class" I said. We walked with linked arms all the way to history.

The classroom was brightly lit, with maps and pictures of ancient civilization structures all over the walls. The desks facing the chalkboard were in perfect straight lines. Alice and I grabbed two open desks next to each other.

"So you said you grew up in Mississippi, what made you move to Chicago" I asked.

Alice's bright smile faded just a bit and her shoulders slumped. "My parents died when I was 10. So my aunt Esme and her husband Carlisle adopted me and moved me out to Chicago to live with them and my cousin Edward. Although he's become more of a brother than a cousin to me." She was gone from this world and lost in another as she answered me.

"Why did you and your family move out here to Forks?" I asked again.

Her vacant eyes suddenly filled up with light again as she spoke. "My uncle Carlisle is a doctor and he got an amazing offer from the hospital. He's now the head physician at Forks Hospital."

"That's cool!" I said. "My dad is Chief of Police"

"Yikes! How does the Chief's daughter ever get to have any fun?" She asked teasingly

"She doesn't" I joked. Alice laughed, bright and clear as twinkling bells. She slapped her hand against her thigh and I laughed with her.

When she finally focused herself, she asked "So what about you? Why did you move from Jacksonville"

Flashes of James's rough touch and harsh words flashed through my mind. My breath hitched in my chest as I momentarily relived his abuse. A warm hand touched my skin and I skidded back to reality. Traitor tears spilled down my cheeks, and I quickly wiped them away before anyone besides Alice noticed. Her eyes were full of concern as she softly rubbed my arm.

"I'm sorry" Alice apologized. "You don't have to tell me if you don't want to. If it's too much too soon." I shook my head and swallowed the lump that had formed in my throat.

"No. It's just . . . " I stopped talking. I wasn't ready to tell anyone other than Emmett about my troubled past, so I covered myself by telling her the half truth. "I just miss my mom. Her new husband Phil plays baseball, and had to travel all the time. In the beginning, my mom would stay home with me, but she would miss him too much to stay behind, so she started going with more and more. She always felt bad for having to choose between me and her husband so I just made it easier for her and moved out here with my dad and brother."

"I'm sorry." She repeated. She squeezed my arm reassuringly. "It's ok to miss someone. No matter how or why they leave us, whether it's permanent or not, it's ok to miss them." I tried smiling at her, because , in that moment, it was all I could do. I missed my mom dearly, but not as much as I hated James. I quickly changed the subject before I could be dragged down by more ugly memories.

"So you said you have a brother, er, cousin. Edward you said?"

"Yeah, he's great!"

"Is he older or younger than you." I asked?

"We're actually just about the same age. If you really want to get technical, he's 2 months older than I am. He's here today too, but he has band first period."

"Cool! What instrument does he play?"

"Piano. He's amazing. I love watching him play, because he just loses himself in the music. He's so passionate about playing, and he even composes his own pieces." Alice paused for a second. "I'm babbling, aren't I?" she asked. I shook my head.

"Sorry" she smiled. "You can meet him at lunch, he promised to sit by me so I wouldn't have to eat alone. You said you have a brother too?"

"Yeah, his name is Emmett. He's loud, he's crude, he's obnoxious, you'll love him!"

Just then the teacher stood up from behind his desk and called the class to attention. The entire hour was spent going over the class syllabus, and learning the names of my classmates. When the bell rung, Alice and I compared schedules. We had every class together except one. Last period I had Gym and she had Health.

"Lucky" she said when she saw my schedule. "I would rather run tracks around the gym than learn about STD's or pregnancy." I just shrugged, because I would rather have health than Gym. All my life I've been uncoordinated, which has made me an extremely clumsy person. Gym was like a reoccurring nightmare to me, one from which I could never pinch myself awake.

Our next two classes, Math and English, passed rather quickly thanks to Alice passing notes back and forth to me. We talked about our favorite movies, hobbies, and celebrities. She told me all about her shoe and purse collection and I told her all about my music and book collection. Before I knew it, we were walking to lunch, arms linked, and giggling like we'd been friend all our lives.

"I know, " Alice spoke between giggles, "I can't believe I used to have a crush on him! I had a shrine dedicated to him in the back of my closet. I cried for an entire week after he came out" I tried picturing Alice and Lance Bass together, before he admitted he was gay.

Alice and I were still giggling when we walked through the cafeteria door. As we were part of the first wave of students making their way to lunch, the cafeteria wasn't too crowded. We hopped in line quickly, and loaded our trays up with food. Spotting an empty table, Alice and I made a beeline through the crowd.

"Bella!" A female voice shouted from behind me. I turned around and tried to figure out who called my name. From across the cafeteria, I spotted Rose waving her hand at me. I nodded in acknowledgment and pointed to the empty table that Alice was already sitting at. Rose flashed me a thumbs up and jumped into line.

"Who was that?" Alice asked around a mouth full of food, as I sat down next to her.

"That's Rosalie. She's Emmett's girlfriend." I paused and took a bite of pizza. "She's great! She's the perfect match for Emmett." Alice nodded as she took another huge bite of food. For such a tiny girl, Alice ate like a horse, and watching her mouth, I couldn't help but notice she chewed like one too. The giggles from earlier bubbled their way back up as I watched Alice eat her lunch. She looked at me confused.

"I just keep picturing you and Lance" I fibbed. Alice rolled her eyes and smiled.

"Yeah, I always pick the gay ones." She laughed along with me and a new wave of girlie giggles erupted. Just then Rose and Emmett walked around the table and set their trays down across from Alice and I. Rose immediately sat down, but Emmett was looking at me like I had suddenly sprouted a second head.

"What?" I ask.

"Nothing, you just . . . you look different " Emmett sputtered out.

"Okay?" I looked at Rose, hoping for an explanation as to Emmett's behavior, but she just shrugged. Emmett sat down next to Rose, put his arm around her shoulder and kissed her on the cheek. At that exact moment, Jasper walked past Emmett and Rose and used his free hand to slap Emmett in the back of the head. Emmett winced in surprised pain.

"Dude?" Emmett yelled. "What the hell was that for?"

"Mauling my sister" Jasper laughed as he set his try down next to Rose, who playfully elbow him when he sat down next to her.

"WHOOSTHISS" Emmett asked after taking a huge bite of his pizza. He was looking at Alice. I was about to introduce Emmett to Alice, but she quickly spoke up for herself.

"Wow! You must be Emmett." She said, turning to me, "I can see what you meant about him being a real charmer." Rose, Jasper, and I started laughing at Alice's jab. Emmett looked at Alice confused and slightly crestfallen.

"Seriously, who are you" Emmett asked.

"My full name is Mary Alice Brandon Cullen, but you can simply call me Alice." She politely extended her hand towards Emmett. He reached across and enveloped her entire hand in his, and gave one solid shake before digging back into his pizza. Alice introduced herself to Rose next, but when she shook Jasper's hand, their fingers seemed to linger together for a few extra seconds.

When they finally pulled away, Alice placed both her hands in her lap and looked down at them. I saw patches of bright red creep their way across her cheeks as she pushed out large breathfuls of air. When I looked up at Jasper to see if he had noticed her reaction, I found him staring at her with a huge smile plastered across his face. He eyes slid from her face to mine and I gave him a look that said 'Stop Staring'. He dropped his gaze back down to his food, but a second later, he snuck a peek back up at Alice.

"There you are Alice" Said a smooth voice from behind me. A body slid into the chair next to mine, and I looked up with a mouth half full of food.

"Edward! Good, you found us." Cheered Alice. "Everyone this is my cousin slash brother Edward. Edward this is Bella, Emmett, Rose, and Jasper." Alice's voice became breathy as she said Jasper's name aloud.

"Hello" Edward said in a smooth voice. He turned and locked eyes with me. My breathe came in a gasp when I noticed the bright emerald green color of his eyes. They were warm and friendly, and held just a hint of a smile. His dark auburn hair was a sexy disheveled mess, and I watched as he ran his long slender fingers through his hair, pushing it back from his forehead. From there my eyes traveled down the side of his face to the line of his jaw, continuing down his neck to the dip at the base of his throat. I heard him speak, but was too distracted to listen. My gaze went back up to his mouth and I watched as his lips parted into a gentle smile.

A sharp elbow in my back brought me back to reality. I looked around and saw that everyone was watching me.

"What?" I asked confused. Everyone chuckled except Emmett, who was barking with loud laughter.

"Earth to Bella" He chortled. "Edward just asked you a question." Heat spread up my neck and across my face. I turned again to look at Edward. His mouth was pulled up to the side in a slightly crooked grin and my heart responded by fluttering wildly in my chest.

"So you're Alice's new BFF that she's been texting me about all morning?" He asked again.

"Yeah, I guess so." I answered.

"Stop Edward, you're embarrassing her" Alice chastised him. He grinned again and starting talking to Emmett. I shut my eyelids and inhaled deeply through my nose. Exhaling out my mouth, I tried to slow my heart and calm my body. Alice leaned in close against my body and whispered in my ear.

"So should I just send out the wedding invitations now, or should I wait until after he's actually popped the question?" I felt her tiny figure shake with laughter next to me.

"Shut. Up" I whispered under my breath back to her. She only laughed harder. I looked up and caught Jasper gazing at me with a look that said 'Stop Staring'. I kept my head down and focused on eating my lunch, listening to my friends talk about their classes so far. Edward's smooth voice rubbed against my skin like velvet, enveloping me in a warm embrace. His presence next to me felt like a magnet inside my body, trying to pull me closer to him. I watched from the corner of my eye, every little movement Edward made next to me.

Relief washed over me when lunch was over, I needed to put physical distance between Edward and I, so that I could calm down my traitor heart and frenzied nerves. Standing up, I carefully maneuvered around my seat and started to walk away from the table, not taking notice of the back pack in my path. As my toe caught against the fabric, I started falling forward for the third time today, but before my face hit the floor a pair of strong arms locked around my body and stopped my downward momentum.

"Bella!" Edward's panicked voice was so close to my ear his breath tickled my skin. Hot sparks of electricity suddenly erupted through my veins, and heated my entire body. I cried out in shock. Since the last attack, any human contact always felt like plunging myself down into ice water. . My lungs would constrict and cause panic induced breathing difficulties. My body would shake and shiver uncontrollably, but I was experiencing something completely different with Edward. My body did not feel cold, but like it was on fire. My lungs didn't feel as if they were closed tight, but rather like they would burst if I took another breath. My body wasn't shaking, but humming with heat. I had never felt sensations like what I was experiencing right now.

Edward quickly pulled me upright, and dropped his arms from around my body. His emerald eyes bore into mine, as he brought his hand up to my face to gently push away a rogue strand of hair that had fallen into my eyes. His slight touch left a trail of heat on my cheekbone.

"Are you ok?" He asked me softly. I couldn't speak. I just nodded. Without any other words, Edward picked up his bag and started heading for the exit of the cafeteria.

Emmett's sad eyes met mine and I simply shrugged my shoulders and shook my head.

"I . . . I don't know." I stuttered. "That was different." The after effects of Edward's touch still buzzed through my body, befuddling my thoughts. I brought my hand up to cup the cheek he touched, feeling the smooth skin of my face. Never in my 17 years of life, had my body ever combusted into flames like it had at his touch. I watched Edward retreat towards to cafeteria exit, and wondered if he felt the same sensations I did. One look at his hands, flexing open and shut, shaking out at his sides, told me that he did.

**Thanks again for reading. I hope you enjoy this chapter! Reviews are always appreciated! **


	4. Touch

**Disclaimer- Twilight is not mine. This story is not Beta'd, so sorry for any misspellings or grammatical errors. **

Alice walked beside me down the hall, watching me cautiously from the corner of her eye. After Edward had left through the cafeteria doors, she turned on me and stared.

"What the hell was that?" She asked me completely mystified. I didn't know how to answer her, because truthfully I didn't even understand it myself. Never in my entire life had I ever experienced anything like that before. The only answer I could give Alice was a shrug.

Before she left, Rose hugged me lightly, taking care not to cause me further alarm. She knew I was still a little jumpy when someone touched me. Emmett had told Rose the bare minimum about my abuse after I first arrived in Forks when I required the help of a woman to shower and use the bathroom. I didn't want to burden her with all the darkness of my past, so I had Emmett tell her I had been attacked only once, by a stranger at a party I attended back in Jacksonville.

Rose grabbed Emmett's hand, and started to pull him towards the crowd now filing out of the cafeteria. He gave me one last sympathetic smile, and turned with Rose to leave. Alice was standing quietly next to me, still looking at me with shock. I ignored her and pulled on my backpack and started walking. She kept pace with me as we weaved through the student body, making our way to Biology.

"You feel like telling me why you screamed?" Alice asked me gently. I wanted to give Alice some type of answer as to my behavior, but didn't want to go anywhere near the truth. The truth was locked away, deep down below the surface where it wouldn't be able to hurt anyone other that me and occasionally Emmett. Even though we had only met that morning, Alice felt like the sister I never knew I had, and I was afraid that if I told her the truth, she would only ever look at me that way Emmett and Rose look at me, with pity and sorrow.

"It just scared me, that's all" I lied. Alice didn't look convinced. "It's fine. Really. Edward just caught me by surprise when he grabbed me and kept me from falling." I didn't want Alice to see the lie in my eyes, so I focused on the ground in front of me, counting the tiles that I walked over.

I tried to distract Alice by changing the subject.

"Jasper barely took his eyes off you during lunch." I stated. It was Alice's turn to stare at the ground below her. A slow red blush crept up her face. I stole her words from earlier. "So should I just send out the wedding invitations now, so should I wait until he's actually popped the question." I mimic jokingly. Alice's bright smile spread across her face.

"Admit it, you are totally hot for Jasper" I teased.

"I just can't help it," She said. with a smile "He's so cute!"

"Why, thank you darling," Said a voice behind us. "You're pretty cute yourself." I couldn't help the embarrassed laugh that came from me as I turned and found Jasper smiling at us. Jasper walked up to Alice and kissed her cheek as he passed.

"Catch you ladies later." He said with a lazy southern drawl. I watched him walk away, until he turned the corner, then I looked to Alice. She stood rooted on spot, pale and in shock. Her wide eyes focused on my face, and then she suddenly burst into a fit of giggles.

"Oh. My. God. Did that really just happen. That didn't happen did it? Oh my God. I . . . I . . . Did he really kiss me? . . . Oh my God." Her shocked expression turned into a look of burning curiosity in a single second. "Did he just call me pretty?"

I laughed and shook my head. "Come on, we're gonna be late" I pulled her by her elbow, until she started moving with me to Biology. Alice held her slender fingers to her cheek, where Jasper's lips had brushed just moments ago. She snapped back to reality and stopped walking, jerking me back a step by my arm.

"Wait. You changed the subject on purpose" Alice accused. "You were literally eye fucking the shit out of Edward at lunch, but when he grabbed you, you started screaming. Why?"

"I told you Alice, he just surprised me. "

"Bullshit" She spit at me. "Why did you scream?"

"Because. . . " I didn't know how to finish this sentence without sounding crazy. "When Edward grabbed me, it felt like I was being zapped with volts of electricity. It burned all over my skin." I confessed.

"Wow." Alice said. "You've got it bad."

"What?! No! It's not like that Alice. I don't like Edward like that. It just surprised me when he shocked me."

"Mmhm" she responded with a doubtful nod. She opened the door to Biology and held it out for me to walk through first. A middle aged man stood behind the long counter in the front of the classroom, pointing to a sheet of paper in front of him.

"Afternoon ladies." He addressed me and Alice. "Here's the seating chart." I walked over, picked up the chart, and held it out for Alice and myself to look at. Alice's name caught my eye right away, her seat was smack dab in the middle of the front row of tables. My name was written over the table directly behind Alice's. The name written next to mine made my stomach drop. I turned around slowly, and found my Biology partner already seated at the table. His head was down, looking at the pages of the textbook he was flipping through. I pinched Alice's arm.

"Ow!" She squealed. Edward's eyes popped up from his book and met with mine, causing the buzzing sensation from earlier to return. Alice looked between me and Edward, smiling.

"Behave" She muttered under her breath and gave me a shove towards my table. I stumbled over and slowly lowered myself into the open seat. Alice simply sat down, turned around in her chair, and rested her arms on the table Edward and I would now be sharing.

"This is so great!" She said. "How funny is it, that all three of us would have a class together?"

I tried to be mad at her, for acting so casual about this situation, but I couldn't deny the pull inside my body, trying to drag itself closer to Edward. The force drawing me towards Edward was overpowering, forcing me to pull in a gasping breath. His piercing green eyes locked with mine, his eyebrows pulled together in confused concern.

"Are you ok?" He asked in a low, smooth voice. Shivers slid over my skin, and heat pooled in my stomach at his tone. His tongue darted out and licked his lips and I watched as the muscles in his throat convulsed as he swallowed. I jerked my head up and down in a nodding motion, hoping he understood my nonverbal response, although I'm sure it looked more like a case of tourretes, than a quiet form of communication.

"God, just get a room and get it over with already!" Alice blurted out sarcastically.

"Alice!" I piqued. My lungs expelled all their air, leaving me coughing and sputtering.

"Stop it Al." Edward warned.

"Oh, she knows I'm just kidding. Don't you Bella?" She turned to me with a smile. I stared at her incredulously. Thankfully, the teacher called the class to order and cut off any further 'jokes' from Alice. He walked around the classroom, placing two syllabi papers onto each table for the partners to read. A spark zapped my skin where Edward's fingers brushed against mine when he passed me my syllabus. His eyes shifted from the paper in his hands to my face, and the look in his gaze told me, that he too, felt the spark.

Breaking eye contact, I looked down at my paper and used my hair as a curtain between Edward and I. My breath was coming in rapid, uneven spurts of oxygen, and my heart was just as erratic. I really tried to concentrate on whatever the teacher was reading from the syllabus, but I was consumed by my traitorous body's refusal to behave and the magnetic pull trying to draw me closer to Edward.

I let my eyes close and tried to breathe. I inhaled through my nose, and exhaled out my mouth. Gaining control of my breath, I worked on slowing down the runaway freight train that was my heart.

"Isabelle Swan?" The teacher called out. Chills ran down my spine and James's face flashed though my mind as I heard my name called out. I hated when anyone called me 'Isabelle', because James had been the only one to call me by my first name.

"Just Bella." I corrected him. I felt the gaze of all my classmates zero in on my back, right between my shoulder blades.

"Bella," he started again, "Have you gotten to the library today to get your text book?"

"Um . . . no." I confessed. "I forgot. I'm sorry"

"Very well Miss Swan. Please look on with Mr. Cullen next to you." My heart that had been racing away was suddenly lodged in my throat, threatening to choke me. I scooted my chair closer to Edward, and he pushed his book towards the center of our table. We leaned our heads in close, trying to focus on the small print of the page, but all I could focus on was Edward's breathing. I tried to make my stammering heart match the pace of his steady breaths. Edward's proximity was making it difficult for me to do anything other than watch him from the corner of my eye. Every little move he made, or every time he shifted in his seat, I watched him with sharp eyes.

I felt his eyes on the side of my face and looked up, catching Edward staring at me. The blush that smeared across my face must have been really bright, because he smiled his crooked grin.

"You're blushing." He whispered. His hand slowly came up to my face, and he tucked my hair back behind my ear. He rested his palm against my cheek for a moment, and i could feel heated electricity radiating from his hand. Without thought, I leaned my face against his palm, wishing the heat from his hand could warm my entire body. When he began pulling his hand back, he let his fingers softly graze my neck and jaw. Goose bumps exploded over my skin and my heart began stammering once more when he dropped his hand from my face.

Suddenly I couldn't breathe. I was choking on my own breath. Flashbacks of James invaded my mind. It felt like James had his hand wrapped around my throat, reminding me he could hurt me anytime he chose. Panic must have shown on my face, because Edward's expression changed from wonder to distress. His eyebrows pulled together, and his eyes filled with concern. A frightened sob was about to break lose from my shaking body, but was swallowed back when Edward slid his hand over mine. Tight pressure closed around my hand, as he enveloped it with his own. The panic and fear immediately dissipated, like the dark smoke of a bad dream dissolving into bright light of the morning sun. My lungs pulled in air, and felt like they wanted to burst open inside my chest if I dared take another breath. I closed my eyes and put my head down, pressing my face against the cool table top.

"Bella?" Edward whispered softly. I opened my eyes, and looked up into his. "Are you ok?" I nodded, afraid to speak. I wasn't sure my voice would be as strong as I wanted it to sound. Edward just squeezed my hand again, and used his thumb to rub small circles on the back of my hand. Afraid what I would see behind my eyes if I looked away from Edward, I kept my gaze with him.

A loud bell ringing broke our connection, and everyone around us stood up from their seats to leave. I stood up and grabbed my backpack before Edward rose from his chair. Alice turned around, looked at me and asked "Ready?" I nodded again, and turned to wave goodbye to Edward.

"See you later Eddie!" Alice called behind her. Edward still hadn't moved from behind our table when I walked through the door, and out into the hall. Alice pulled me along to art class, but I wasn't paying attention. The faces of the classmates that walked past me blurred together, as my mind refused to process the fact we were no longer holding hands with Edward. For some reason, that thought brought tears to my eyes. I don't know why I was suddenly so sad, normally the thought of human contact made bile rise in my throat, but now I just wanted to feel the buzzing energy of Edward's touch. Using my free hand, I wiped away the tears in my eyes before they had the chance to betray me by spilling over my cheeks.

Art class passed quickly. After going over the syllabus and getting a tour of the room, we only had five minutes until the bell would ring.

"Edward likes you." Alice just blurts out. "Back in Chicago, he never held any type of interest for a girl, not even our next door neighbor Tanya. She was drop dead gorgeous, and she hit on Edward every single day, but not once did he ever show any feelings in return. But during lunch and Biology, he couldn't keep his eyes off you."

"I don't know Alice. When he touches me, it's like hot energy buzzing and vibrating through out my entire body. It feels like I might slip out of my own skin if I don't hold on tight enough. I've never felt anything like this before."

"But does it hurt?" She asked.

"No. Not really" I admitted. "But it scares me."

"Why? Why does that scare you Bella?" I don't want to answer, and thankfully, I won't have to because the bell rings. Alice gives me a tight hug and she leaves for Health class. I grudgingly head towards the locker rooms to change for Gym. There are maybe a dozen other girls in the locker room when I arrive, changing without reservations in front of their classmates. I am not that confident with my own body. I know the bruises are gone and there is no longer any physical evidence of his abuse, but I always feel them on me. Grabbing my gym clothes, I walk into the bathroom and change in a stall. I stuff my school clothes into my gym locker and follow the other girls towards the gym.

Coach Clapp greeted us right outside the doors to the gym and told us he had the boys setting up the nets for volleyball. I groaned and wished the world would open and swallow me up. I hated volleyball because I always hit someone else with the ball instead of actually hitting it over the net. We followed the coach inside the gym and stood by the doors, watching the boys work together to stretch the nets taught. A warm hand was placed against my back, and I jumped in surprise when I felt the electricity.

"Edward!" I exclaimed.

"Sorry Bella, I didn't mean to scare you."

"That's ok. I've experienced worse." I answered truthfully. Edward's eyes filled up with questions, but before he could ask any of them, Coach Clapp told us we could warm up by walking around the gym a few times. Edward and I set an easy pace, and walked stride for stride beside each other.

"So Alice tells me you guys are from Chicago. What do you miss about Chicago?" I asked, trying to keep the conversation centered on him.

"I miss going to Cub's games. I miss the museums, and concert halls, and this awesome piano bar that served the best coffee in Chicago." He was smiling as he remembered his childhood home. I felt myself smiling, and knew it was because he was so happy talking about his past. "I know Alice misses the malls in Chicago" He laughed.

"Yeah, that sounds like her. Is she a shoppaholic?"

"Definitely. She had so many clothes, she couldn't fit them into her closet, so she put them in mine." He laughed at the memory. "She started crying when I _first_ told her no."

"First?" I repeat him.

"Yeah, once she started crying I caved. In the end, she took over my closet. There was enough space for me to hang three shirts of my own in there." I laughed as I pictured Alice elbowing her way between two different hanging garments in order to hang a third.

"You two sound like siblings."

"Lord knows we fight like siblings." Edward told me. "Don't let her size fool you, if it comes down to it, she can throw a punch." I shook my head in disbelief.

"I can't picture Alice fighting." I confessed.

"Oh believe me. When she came to live with us after her parents passed away, I came home from a friend's house and she had moved all my stuff into the guest room and had taken over my room. I demanded she get her crap out of _my_ room, but she started screaming at me, telling me that it was her room, and if I had a problem with it I could, and I quote, 'Suck her dick'." Edward had used his pointer finger and middle finger to make air quotes.

"Yeah, I've noticed Alice has a bit of a mouth on her."

"That she does." Agreed Edward. "She doesn't have much of a brain-mouth filter, she just says whatever she feels like. She's always been like that though, I can never remember a time of her being different than that."

Coach Clapp blew his whistle and motioned for all of us to start walking over towards him. He split us into teams of two, and had us play volleyball against other teams in the class. Edward was elected to be my partner and I cringed. I knew that I would hit Edward with the volleyball at least once, and was afraid of how he would react. The couple on the first team we played were named Ben and Lauren. Ben played pretty good, but Lauren treated the ball like it was a piranha, avoiding it at all costs. I mainly stood at the back of the court and watched Edward play. His strong limber arms sent the ball back over the net every time. His muscles would shrink and stretch with every move, and I stared, captivated. We had won 2 matches when the coach blew his whistle and signaled for everyone to rotate.

The boy on the team we were about to play looked familiar.

"Bella!" He cheered. Mike! His name was Mike!

"Hi Mike."

"How's your first day going?" He asked me.

"Good." I told him. "How's your day going?" I asked back.

"Better now that I got to talk to you again." He said, full of confidence. He stepped a little closer to me. "Hey look, if you need someone to show you around Forks or anything, I would be more that happy to volunteer my services." He brought his hand up, like he meant to rest it upon my shoulder, but I stepped back from him before he could, so his hand just fell through empty air.

"Have you met my partner Edward Cullen?" I ask, extending my arm out for Edward. He stepped into my reach and wrapped his arm around my back, holding his free hand out for Mike to shake.

"Hey Mike. I'm Edward." He said in a solid voice and grasped Mike hand firmly in his They exchanged a few other greetings and such, but I didn't hear any of it, because Edward's hand was touching me again. Heat radiated out through my body, from where Edward's hand was settled on my back. . Mike's partner cleared her throat, hoping for us to notice her. Mike finally remembered her and introduced her.

"Bella, Edward. This is Jessica!" When Mike said her name, she looked up at his face with longing, but quickly looked elsewhere when she caught me watching her. The four of us started our first match. Edward took his usual spot up front by the net, and I stood in the back, watching him beat Mike and Jessica. As the match went on, I watched as Mike tried harder and harder to score against Edward. He was visibly getting frustrated by his inability to score even a point.

After losing the first match, Mike said "Hey Bella, why don't you come up front and get some playing time, instead of Cullen and me hogging the ball."

"No, I'm fine back here" I assured Mike.

"I insist Bella. Edward and I haven't given you a chance to play." Mike said breathlessly. Edward simply shrugged and walked to the back of the court where I was standing.

"Don't worry about it Bella." He whispered in my ear. "Mike just wants to score a few points, we'll switch back soon." I nodded and walked up closer to the net.

Jessica served the ball, and sent it flying towards the back corner to Edward, who hit it back with easy grace. Just as the ball was about to fly over the net, Mike jumped out and spiked the ball back down. The next three seconds slowed down and split into frames, clicking past one by one. The ball was flying straight at me. Behind me, Edward called out my name in panic, and Mike's face turned from triumph to tortured. There was no time to move away or bring my arms up to block my face, there was only time to turn my face away from the ball. The force from the ball knocked my head back so violently that I lost my balance. My feet came up as my head continued falling backwards. I felt my head crack against the hard gym floor, followed by my body falling into a limp heap. When my back hit the floor, the force knocked the wind from my lungs. I fought to draw in a breath, but couldn't make my lungs behave and start working again.

"Bella!" Edward shouted. His face swam into my vision, mixing with the stars and flashes of light. I gripped his arm, and begged my body to breath. I was panicking.

"Shhh. Shhh Bella. It's ok. Relax." He brushed my hair behind my ears, and placed his hands on either side of my face, forcing me to look at him. "When you relax your windpipe will open back up." Edward told me in his smooth voice. He kept speaking to me, but I couldn't make out the words, so I just listened to his voice. I imagined his voice was a blanket, and I wrapped myself in it, willing it to help me relax my body. It was working, but not fast enough. The edges of my vision began to grey and blur.

Through the fog and pain, I reached up and touched Edward's face. His eyes were panicked, but calmed slightly as I held my hand against his face. His cheek felt as smooth and soft as his velvet voice. The warm buzzing sensation traveled up my arm and straight to my heart, spreading out to the rest of my body from there. I sighed and closed my eyes. Sweet, painless oblivion cradled me, waiting for me to give myself over, but not before I heard Edward shout very close to my ear "Fuck!"

**Thanks again to everyone who reads this story! I hope you liked it. Reviews are appreciated. Check back next week for an update! **


	5. Waking Up

Disclaimer- I do not own Twilight, although I wish everyday that I did.

Sorry for the delay this week. I had an entirely new chapter, written and ready to post last Sunday, but decided I didn't like it. So I scrapped the whole chapter and rewrote this one! Enjoy!

_James ran his hand down the side of my body, roughly grabbing the flesh of my behind. Tears fell down my face,and I prayed that he would change his mind and leave. He continued to rub his hands up and down my sides and back, massaging my tensed body. _

_"Relax Isabelle." He purred. "I just want to spend some quality alone time with you. Phil and Renee never leave anymore." _

_"No. Please. I don't want this." I begged quietly. I just wanted to get back into the shower, and for James to leave. James brought his hands up, and started rubbing my shoulders gently. _

_"What was that sis? I didn't hear you." He asked _

_"I don't wa-" James dug his fingers into my shoulders before I could finish my plea. Clamping down on my body, he tore a scream from my throat. He pulled my body back, flush against his chest. I could feel his erection against my lower back, and I knew this was going to happen no matter how much I begged him not to. _

_"You're going to love what I have planned for you." James whispered into my ear. He swept my wet hair from my back, over my shoulder, and brought his mouth down against the side of my throat. He kissed his away down my neck, over my shoulder, and bit down hard. I screamed trying to pull my shoulder from his firm grasp, but he kept a steady hold of my body. _

_"Shhh . . . Isabelle, don't scream yet, wait until I'm inside you." He murmured in my ear. His hand snuck around to the front of my body, and cupped my groin. _

_"Please don't." I sobbed. "Please, just leave." His free hand shot up, and grabbed at my throat, cutting off my air. _

_"No, Isabelle. You are mine. And I will have what's mine." James walked forward, pushing me up against my bathroom counter. His hips pinned my lower body against the front of my counter, while his hands pushed my upper body down across the top. He wound his hand in my hair, and tugged sharply._

_"Look at me in the mirror." He barked. I took a deep, calming breath before I lifted my eyes to meet his in the mirror. His eyes were full of fire, and he smiled with a sickening joy. He removed his hand from my hair, to reach down and undo his pants, letting them fall in a heap around his feet. _

_"I want you to watch Isabelle, as I take what is mine." James pushed his erection into me, slowly, inch by inch. Pain shuddered through my body as James began thrusting inside me again and again. He grabbed a fistful of my hair, and pulled my head back. When I looked at his face in the mirror, he was staring at me with a look of vehement desire. His free hand roamed over my naked back, before finally settling both hands on my hips and gripping tightly. _

_"I must say, I rather like this position. I almost lose control every time I watch your beautiful face scrunch when I push inside you." I tried to drop my head down so he couldn't see my face in the mirror, but James just grabbed my hair and held my head back. _

_"I'm so close baby." James sighed. He released my hair and grabbed my hips once more, and continued his leisurely torment. Suddenly he stilled, and emptied himself into me. His sweaty palms slid up and down my back a few more times, until he stepped back and pulled out of me. Reaching over, James grabbed a hand towel, and threw it at me. _

_"You were amazing babe, just like always." James whispered against my ear. He picked up his pants, and walked out of my bathroom, closing the door behind him. Silent sobs rocked my body, as I sagged down off my counter and onto the floor. I reached up, grabbing for the towel hanging from the curtain rod, and yanked it down to wrap around my body. Curling up into a small ball on my bathroom floor, I closed my eyes and tried to calm my body down. _

_Once I had my breathing and heart rate under control, I crawled back into the shower, intent on scrubbing all traces of James away from my body. Even though I had scrubbed my skin raw, I could still feel his touch all over, and the memories of his touch brought with them bile. I sank to my knees in my shower, and emptied my stomach down the shower drain. _

_Turning off the shower, I wrapped my body in a towel, and headed out into my room. I changed quickly and crawled into bed. Hugging my knees, I cried myself to sleep. _

My body felt heavy and sore. My head throbbed. My ears were ringing loudly. My eyes burned from a bright light shining through my eyelids. The bed I was laying in was too firm to be comfortable. I groaned and tried to bring my hand up to cover my eyes, but a hand locked onto my wrist and pushed it back down. _James._ I thought. He's here again. I tried to bring my hand up again, but he was quicker, pushing it back down against my side. Not this time, I thought. I was going to fight him this time. His hand swept a hair from my face, but continued down over my jaw and across my neck. Anger bubbled up inside me, and I finally found my voice.

"No!" I screamed. "No!" I began thrashing around, not one, but two pairs of hands pushed me back against the bed.

"Bella! Bella! Calm down. You're okay." I recognized that voice. I peeled open my eyes and found Charlie standing beside my bed. He started to bring his hand up to touch my cheek, but my flinching stopped him and he dropped his hand.

"Oh Bells, I'm so happy you're okay." He said.

"Me too" Said a voice to my right. I slowly turned my stiff neck, and met Emmett, standing on the other side of my bed. .

"What happened?" I asked in a raspy voice.

"Well Honey, " My dad began. "You were in Gym, and you fell down and hit your head really hard."

"I know that. I can remember that. How did I get to the hospital?" I asked.

"Edward Cullen called the station, and told me what happened. He told me he carried you out to his car, and that he was driving you to the hospital."

"What?" I nearly screamed. "He carried me? He held me when I was unconscious? He touched me?" I started crying as I imagined his hands all over my body. Edward wasn't James, but that still didn't keep me from panicking about the thought of his hands on me. Suddenly, I felt dirty and tired. All I wanted to do was take a bath and a nap.

Emmett grabbed my hand and held it tightly in his, using his free hand to wipe away the tears that spilled over. I knew Edward wasn't like James, and I trusted that he would never take advantage of me, but I still felt sick knowing that his hands had touched my body while I was unconscious. Whether from hitting my head or the side effects from the pain meds, I was lost in a thick foamy fog. Earlier, when Edward touched me, it was like grabbing a live wire, his touch sent jolts of electricity racing through my blood. It was an incredible high, a huge adrenaline rush when his skin grazed mine. Yet at the same time, I find myself panicking because he touched me while I was unconscious. Was I freaking out because he touched me without my knowledge or because I missed the rush his touch gave me.

A knock on the door disrupted my train of thoughts. In walked a man dressed in dark gray slacks, a pale blue shirt, navy tie, and a white lab coat. His blonde hair was neatly combed into place, and his blue eyes held a trace of a smile. He walked through the door and stepped inside, allowing the door to close, but just before it slammed shut, I caught a sliver of copper hair and one green eye peeking through the open crack of the door. Why was Edward waiting outside my hospital room? I turned to ask Emmett, but he just shook his head before I could even open my mouth. Perplexed, I just shrugged. I would wait until after the doctor left to ask Emmett.

"Ahh! Nice to see you awake Ms. Swan." He said, extending his hand out to shake. "My name is Dr. Cullen, and I've been taking care of you." He grasped my extended hand firmly and gave it a few shakes. Dr. Cullen? As in . . .

"Are you Edward's dad?" I blurted out. The second I asked the question, I wished so badly that I could take it back. I felt myself starting to blush. Dr. Cullen had the graciousness to laugh lightly.

"Why yes I am," He said. "Edward called me and told me what happened, and requested I personally look over you!" The blush that was ghosting across my face suddenly exploded out over my entire body. Edward had asked his father to check me over and make sure I was ok. I wondered what Carlisle thought of Edward's request, if he found it as strange as I did.

"Is that why Edward is waiting outside?"

"Edward **_and_** Alice are both waiting outside. They're very worried about you." Carlisle said. "But before we let your visitors inside, let's have a look at your MRI scans." He walked over to the light box, turned it on, and held a grid of what must have been my brain's scans up to the light. He narrowed his eyes and leaned it close, studying the shadows of the images.

"Well Ms. Swan, it does indeed look as though you've had a slight concussion. You're just going to have to take it easy for the next week. You can attend school if you feel up to it, but no gym, or physical activity for the next 10 days. You can take advil for the pain, and we'll give you some pills to help fight the nausea, but if you start feeling worse, please come in immediately."

"Thank you Doctor!" Charlie spoke before I could. Reaching his hand out to shake Carlisle's.

"You're more than welcome Chief Swan!" He replied, shaking Charlie's offered hand. "Nice to meet you as well Emmett, take good care of your little sister. Feel better soon Bella!"

"Thank you Dr. Cullen." I said. With that, he opened the door and left, but before it could even close completely, Alice burst into the room and ran straight to my bedside. She gripped my hand with both of hers, and clutched in against her chest.

"Jesus Fucking Christ Isabella Marie Swan!" She struggled out.

"Whoa!" I started. "What are you middle naming me for? I didn't do anything"

"Didn't do anything? You nearly gave me a heart attack!"

"Well I'm sor- . . . Wait! How did you know my middle name?" I asked. I never told Alice my middle name.

"I read your file." She admitted nonchalantly with a wave of her hand.

"What?" I sputtered. "You read my file? Why would you read my file! That's such an invasion of privacy. Not to mention against the law. Alice. You can't just go around reading people's personal medical files. I can't believe you just read my file." When I finished my rant, I saw that Alice was just staring at my like I was the world's most boring math teacher.

"Are you done?" She asked. My mouth dropped open and I was rendered completely speechless. Alice had no respect for the term privacy. When I didn't answer, Alice continued.

"You've been unconscious for almost an hour! Carlisle wasn't giving me any answers and I was so worried. Besides, all I really learned from your file was your middle name, your possible concussion and that you're menstruating. Explains the weird mood swings."

"Well OK then. Emmett and I are going to go sign your discharge papers." My dad said quickly as he ran out the door, right behind Emmett. Oh. My. God. I was officially mortified. I was in the hospital due to a concussion from being hit in the face by a volleyball in gym and now my dad and my brother both knew I was on my period.

Great.

"Geez Alice! Can you please not announce to the world that my vagina is bleeding!"

"Um . . . I'll come back later" I looked from Alice to the door, and found Edward standing just inside my room, blushing bright red. He gave me a small awkward wave before backing out and closing the door to my hospital room. My heart stopped.

"Smooth." Said Alice sarcastically. "Move over. It's 6:00, time for Ambush Makeover reruns." She climbed up onto the bed next to me, reached across my torso, grabbed the remote and turned on the tv. She turned and looked at me expectantly. "Move over bed hog!"

I scooted over, and Alice flipped through the channels until she found the show she was looking for. She pulled a can of pop and a bag of chips from her purse and stated snacking. Alice just made herself at home on my hospital bed, even using my shoulder as a pillow. We watched one full episode before a small knock came from the door.

Edward poked his head in. "Is it safe to come in now?" He asked. Alice laughed and shook her head.

"Yes Edward. We're done talking about our menstruation cycles." Alice said. Edward cringed a little from Alice's choice of words, but seemed satisfied by her answer, because he opened the door all the way and walked in. He walked over and plopped down into the chair beside my bed. He pushed his legs out straight, crossed his ankles, and folded his hands across his stomach.

"Again Alice?" He questioned.

"Yep" She answered. Edward just nodded and watched the screen. I used his distraction to stare at him. His shaggy hair looked soft and plush, and my fingers itched to run through his strands. I copied him, and folded my hands across my stomach so that I wouldn't be tempted. I studied his profile, the slope and point of his nose, the curves of his lips, the line of his jaw, the muscles in his neck. Alice nudged me, and was giving me a knowing smile. She wiggled her eyebrows, and quickly jutted her chin in Edward's direction.

"Well, if you'll excuse me, I'm going to go home and shave my legs." Alice announced dubiously. She hopped down off my bed, grabbed her purse and without further conversation, walked out of the room. When the door slammed shut, I was painfully aware that Edward was staring at me. I closed my eyes and tried to center myself. My eyes automatically locked with Edward's when I opened my eyelids.

"Are you ok?" He asked quietly. I just nodded slowly. Edward's eyes slid shut, and he let out a huge sigh, relaxing into the chair he was sitting in.

"Bella, you really worried me." He admitted. When he didn't add anything, I said the only thing I could think of.

"Sorry" I squeaked out. Edward let out a another huge sigh, shaking his head.

"Sorry? You're sorry?" He asked.

"Yeah. I mean, I think I am. No. . . yeah. I am." Wasn't I? I was confused at how this conversation was going.

"So you're telling me _you_ feel sorry because your gym partner is worried about you because he let Mike Newton talk him into switching positions just so he could score a few points, and then Mike ends up getting so competitive that he slams the ball in your face so hard that you lose consciousness and end up getting a concussion. _You_ feel sorry?"

"Umm . . . I don't know." I admitted.

"Bella." Edward rubbed his face with his hands, and covered his eyes for a brief moment before dropping them back into his lap. "Bella, _I'm_ sorry. I never should have let Mike talk me into trading places with you. I feel terrible cause you got hurt." Edward leaned forward, and stretched his hand out, reaching for my face.

James's face flashed through my mind, and I instantly recoiled from Edward's touch. His hand stopped midair, and he stared at me, eyes wide, full of hurt and confusion. His eyebrows pulled together and he dropped his hand against my bed. I liked Edward. I didn't want to be afraid of him, but between my recent nightmare of James's abuse and the knowledge that Edward's hands were all over my body while I was unconscious, made me hesitant to feel the electric pulse of his touch.

Edward nodded, put his hands on his knees and stood up out of the chair. He watched me for a few seconds, before simply nodding his head once, and turning to head for the door. I didn't want Edward to touch me right now, but I didn't want to be alone. I didn't want him to leave, but what could I say to make him stay. It was only seconds earlier that I recoiled from his touch like his hand was a glowing iron brand.

"Wait!" I spoke quietly, just as Edward's hand closed around the door handle. "I don't want to be by myself. Please just stay until Charlie and Emmett get back from discharging me." I watched Edward's shoulders rise and fall as he took a deep breath, and dropping his hand from the door, he returned dutifully to his previous seat.

"What would you like to do while we wait?" He asked.

"Umm . . . I think Ambush Makeover might still be on." I suggested.

"Ambush Makeover it is!" Edward sighed and turned in his seat to watch the rest of the show. He stayed with me, even after the episode's credits rolled, and I flipped through the channels until I found a daily news broadcast, which he also watched in silence.

"Thank you for staying Edward." I breathed.

"Anytime Bella." he replied.

Thank you again for reading my fic! Reviews are greatly appreciated, so thanks to those who have written them!


	6. Author's Note 2

Hello loyal readers.

I would like to begin by apologizing to all of you for not updating my story in weeks. My dog, Buster, was a golden lab who was a goofy, 100 pound lap dog who loved to play frisbee and snuggle under my covers with me every night. So when my best friend of the past 11 years, became very sick, I devoted all of my time to helping him. Sadly, despite the several vet visits, his health just continued to decline and so 3 weeks ago I made the decision to have him put down. It has been a very rough time for me, so I beg for your forgiveness and patience. I've now begun working on the next chapter, and hope to have it uploaded within a day, maybe two.

Thank you all for your patience and support!


End file.
